Shame - the Shadow Side of the Solar Plexus Chakra
CLEARING THE SHADOWS
Our Shadow Self are the parts of ourselves that are in ‘darkness’. These parts are the fear, emotions and powerlessness we have trapped within us. These are the parts of us that feel separated from worthiness, separated from life and separated from love, wholeness, security and well-being. We all have them and we don’t have to be stuck with them. Our shadows are striving to create our awakening to ourselves. The shadows are where defenses and hiding places are, that seek to stay in the unconscious.
Your Solar Plexus Chakra deals with your relationship with yourself and is blocked by Shame which closes down your "Right to Act" and claim and maintain your connection to your Higher Self.
What Is Shame?
Shame is the inner experience of being "not wanted." It is feeling worthless, rejected, cast-out. Guilt is believing that one has done something bad; shame is believing that one is bad. It’s a feeling that is closely related to embarrassment and humiliation. When we feel ashamed, we feel worthless, unimportant, not worthy.
Shame is usually in relationship to others. We want to hide from others, hide ourselves, not be seen, not be present. Shame keeps us from being and feeling alive, awake and in our bodies. We even try to hide our shame from ourselves. We avoid it, push it away, project it on others, and suppress it. We are ashamed of our shame.
How Does Shame Make Us Feel? What Does It Look Like?
People who are experiencing shame often look and feel small, shrinking. Our heads may be bowed, our eyes downcast, we won’t make eye contact…we look away, we hide, we cower. The expression “hang your head in shame” captures some of the physicality of it. With intense shame we get hot in the face…we blush, which only makes the shame feel worse as we are exposed even more. We're embarrassed on top of ashamed!
Many of us are locked into toxic shame and we don’t know how to escape. We see ourselves as the problem, as bad:
I’m dumb, stupid, clumsy
I can’t do anything right!
What’s wrong with me?
I’m so awkward, fat, ugly, short, etc.
Where Does Shame Come From?
We take on shame early in our lives from what we are told and what we experience about ourselves, especially in relationship with our parents and siblings. Examples of situations that can cause shame:
· Parents who are overly critical of their children, who yell or physically mistreat them.
· Children who have lost a parent.
· Children who have not had regular experiences of being loved.
· Children and adults who have experienced trauma or abuse.
If you have toxic shame, you probably resonated to one or more of the phrases in the previous section. Think back to where you heard these first, before you internalized them…and it could very well be from one of your parents. Here are some other toxic shame triggers you may have heard growing up:
You should be ashamed of yourself
What’s wrong with you?
Who do you think you are?
Have you no shame?
Shame on you!
Often we have shame related to our bodies…we feel as if we are dirty, or smelly or unclean in some way. Or we are ashamed of the way our body behaves…we feel we are awkward, too short or tall or just “ugly.” We have shame about sex, shame about our eating habits and abilities too. All this toxic shame can be traced back to our upbringing... we may not have been told in words, but learned to have a negative view of ourselves from what others did and didn't do.
And a lot of shame gets reinforced when we go to school. Peers criticize and ostracize those who are different in some way. Making others feel small is a way a bully tries to feel big. A lot of bullies grow up continuing this behavior as adults.
Toxic Shame and Love
When we are caught up in shame, we’ve lost ourselves and feel unworthy of being loved. Healing toxic shame is about learning to love…starting with our own selves.
It is important to let go of the barriers to giving and receiving love. This often means going back into old feelings, and the associated toxic shame, where we’ve lost ourselves. It’s in these feelings, not our thoughts, that deep healing can occur.
Many adults feel numb and “out of it” because of what they’ve suppressed. As these feelings are brought up into the light of day and transformed, people wake up to their power and love.
As toxic shame and its associated emotions are healed, people find they can live in their bodies in a whole new way. You can feel much more open, spacious, motivated, free and alive.
1. Take a minute or two to quiet your mind, center yourself and become present in your body. You may want to take a few slow breaths, focusing on the sensations of breathing in and out, becoming more mindful of the present moment.
2. Now sit or stand in front of a mirror and look closely at your face. Let your eyes relax so you can see your whole face without tension. Look in your eyes, but continue to see your whole face. Look with loving eyes, sending love and acceptance to the person you see in front of you. Tell yourself "I love you" and any other message you would like to receive such as "You are beautiful just as you are" or "You are smart and creative." Spend at least 3-5 minutes. Stay in the present moment, out of old stories from the past.
3. Before you end the exercise, notice how you feel and see if you look different in the mirror.
4. Forgiving Self will help your process of release.
SUPPORTING YOUR LIGHT
Bringing light to the shadows is a vital part of your spiritual path because it honors the need to explore and embrace all parts of you. Your 'Right to Act', means claiming and maintaining your connection to your Higher Self.
The secret of getting what you want in life is to get in the vibrational frequency of what you want – to go to the FEELING and BEING place of what you want. We support you in manifesting your light through a variety of ways such as life coaching, guided meditations, affirmations, and development of personal goals, etc.
Part of what we offer you are 'Solar Plexus Chakra Daily Practice' suggestions which is a unique part of the PrimeMyChakras program created to help you awaken to being at home in higher levels of consciousness. This gift will be given to you during the coaching process.
By working with your Solar Plexus Chakra, you can find a sense of peace to build your life upon. PrimeMyChakras program is designed to give you the tools you need to raise your vibration and deepen your connection to your Higher Self. Release yourself from Shame from past challenges, open to new possibilities, and get "unstuck" by awakening the heart of your Solar Plexus Chakra.
Emotions have a vibrational frequency to them. The lowest emotional vibration we can experience is Shame.
There is nothing more important than how you are vibrating. Your personal vibration is your greatest resource. When we raise our vibrations, life can take on an effortless flow, relationships are harmonic and abundance streams with ease. Your core mission is to wake up, connect to the source of who you really are – and raise your personal vibration. Ultimately, you will experience a new more enlightened world.